I commute from Peterborough to London and endure this twice every week day, it's horrid! And the worst of it is the script they have to read isn't even grammatical.
"Hi, my name is Tracy your train guard today..."
Really? Your name is "Tracey your train guard" today? What is it tomorrow? If it had just been written at "Hi, I'm [name] and I'm you're train guard..." I wouldn't be cringing at it every single time. And then they tell you how you can use electronics in the quiet coach provided it is switched to "the silent mode", as though there's one big universal silent mode that anything can be switched to. And it's always delivered in this weird sing-song voice that nobody uses to talk with, and it's done so fast that if you did actually need to know any of it you'd not pick it up at all, the understanding comes with familiarity, but at the same time comes irritation and contempt. They tell me all about the different coaches, how to use the wifi, how to look after my luggage, where the train is stopping, what tickets are valid, and how to report anything suspicious, among trivialities about what the buffet car is selling and how long the queue is. It's utterly awful. Why do they persist in this torture?!
Great stuff, a perfect use of audio boo, they drive you mad!, airports are as bad!, especially when you're reading or nodding off or on the phone, and these buggers start invading the space between my ears!
Oh I feel a bit better now :O)
i totally agree with the sentiment. people shouting at you over a tannoy about hot and cold beverages, is ritualised harassment dressed in the raiments of customer service..
Try the Dundee to Fife line sometime, the most endearing old grey haired man with Simon cowell style trousers, priceless audio right there.
TheGirlWho about 4 years ago
Ack, can't believe I moaned about grammar and then wrote the wrong "your" in the sentence. Damn.
Hawkida about 4 years ago
I commute from Peterborough to London and endure this twice every week day, it's horrid! And the worst of it is the script they have to read isn't even grammatical.
"Hi, my name is Tracy your train guard today..."
Really? Your name is "Tracey your train guard" today? What is it tomorrow? If it had just been written at "Hi, I'm [name] and I'm you're train guard..." I wouldn't be cringing at it every single time. And then they tell you how you can use electronics in the quiet coach provided it is switched to "the silent mode", as though there's one big universal silent mode that anything can be switched to. And it's always delivered in this weird sing-song voice that nobody uses to talk with, and it's done so fast that if you did actually need to know any of it you'd not pick it up at all, the understanding comes with familiarity, but at the same time comes irritation and contempt. They tell me all about the different coaches, how to use the wifi, how to look after my luggage, where the train is stopping, what tickets are valid, and how to report anything suspicious, among trivialities about what the buffet car is selling and how long the queue is. It's utterly awful. Why do they persist in this torture?!
Hawkida about 4 years ago
hahahaha
milesst about 4 years ago
Great stuff, a perfect use of audio boo, they drive you mad!, airports are as bad!, especially when you're reading or nodding off or on the phone, and these buggers start invading the space between my ears!
Oh I feel a bit better now :O)
shoes about 4 years ago
i totally agree with the sentiment. people shouting at you over a tannoy about hot and cold beverages, is ritualised harassment dressed in the raiments of customer service..
Samlukeanthony about 4 years ago