petegoldE3 BLEW MY MIND.
Intro
I've never played a video game before.
Not since 1984
When there was no blood and there was no gore
And loading Frogger took an hour or more.
Then I went to visit Los Angeles.
Where there's nothing but cars and plastic cheese
And they took me on a trip to see E3
And it blew my mind and weakened my knees.
Haven’t felt this weird since I ate some of that cake my friend Kevin made in college.
My consciousness got tied in knots.
I ate some ghosts, and a whole lot of dots
I killed a werewolf with a big sword.
I crushed an armoured arachnid horde.
I fought off an Aztec with a sharp blade
I blew up a jeep with a hand grenade.
I wielded a gun in Akimbo stants.
In a skintight boobtube and hotpants.
A giant blue hedgehog swooped and soared.
With a fox on a turbo hoverboard.
A noble knight fought a noble quest
While a rapstar sang like Kanye West
I stole a chopper and from a Viet Cong camp
I earned my belt as a boxing champ.
I met James Brown and I took it to the bridge
He said my drumming was average.
I’m driving a Ferrari: sleek and red.
I’m a one man mission to kill the undead
I’m Commanding armies: full of wrath.
I’m a tiny little boy made of hessian cloth.
I'm a champion skiier on a slalom slope
I'm a hooded assassin trying to kill the pope.
I'm a mutant hulk with a bloody great gun
Slaughtering thousands: cor it’s fun.
The North Koreans have taken DC
Get a mug for nothing and a pen for free.
Rob the bank. Run from the fuzz.
Meet new toys with Woody and Buzz.
Love on the run. Sex on the beach.
Blow stuff up with Halo Reach.
Fists go punch. Skulls go crunch.
And all of this before my lunch.
Aaaaaagh.
penguinNerdHere's Part One of my PS+ feature I've posted on the site. It's got the full breakdown from the first 6 months I was a + member. http://www.pspenguin.net/2011/02/07/my-voyage-so-far-playstation-plus-part-one/ Part 2 will be up in a few weeks.
